ASHEVILLE, NC—In a lengthy report laying out recommendations it described as absolutely essential to its client’s future success, consulting firm Hewitt Lord Advisors suggested Tuesday that a business keep the consulting firm on for six more months. “After reviewing the numbers, we can say with confidence that retaining the services of Hewitt Lord Advisors should be your top priority for the next two quarters,” the report from Hewitt Lord Advisors read in part, adding that the consulting firm furthermore recommended the business double the amount it was currently paying the consulting firm in order to optimize results going forward. “While our projections for your firm remain optimistic, they are dependent on your continuing to compensate us through December, at least. It’s clear from the information we’ve gathered that not renewing your contract with us would have potentially devastating consequences for your bottom line, especially considering that our in-depth analysis of your strategic spending indicates you need us to conduct additional analyses of your strategic spending immediately. You could also realize our heightened revenue projections by setting aside more cash for your next contract with us, as 2021 is certain to bring with it new challenges for your firm and new fees from ours.” The report went on to suggest several ways the client could free up funds to spend on the consulting firm, such as cutting staff benefits and laying off several dozen employees.
9 months ago